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"WORDS OF WISDOM..."

Friends don't let friends take home ugly women.

Beauty is only a light switch away.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's all get wasted together and have the time of our lives.

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?"

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit.

At the feast of ego everyone leaves hungry.

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

Make love, not war.

-Hell, do both

GET MARRIED!

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.

A Bikers Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or tits, you're going to have trouble with it.

If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?

Congress!